There’s nothing quite like the total relaxation one feels in the summer! The carefree days when the schedule is wide open, and there’s all the time in the world to get caught up on reading, writing, and rest!
But first, there are a just a few things to check off the list. Summer is an important time to get chores done. And the boys are all home from college and boarding school — yay! —which means I’ve got some important tasks to accomplish before settling in to those long, lovely days of summer. So let’s get started!
- Go through the mountain of duffel bags, crates, suitcases, and boxes the kids have deposited in the living room.
- Do the laundry – easily 30 loads — of sheets, mattress pads, blankets, sweatshirt, and bath towels.
- Make vet appointments for the pets, including the extra cat one of the kids has brought home for the summer. It seems all vaccines are overdue. Whoops!
- Make appointments for the kids, including but not limited to yearly physicals, teeth cleaning, dermatology consults, STD screenings, eye exams, two leftover immunizations (meningococcal and HPV), and some fucking haircuts.
- Fill prescriptions for near-sighted family members who need new glasses and contact lenses.
- Make orthodontist appointments to get replacement retainers.
- Apparently no one owns shoes. Get on that.
- My turn: Mammogram, pap smear, dermatologist, and some highlights. And a psychiatrist. Don’t forget the colonoscopy.
- Go to the drug store for Cetaphil, Clearasil, Claritin, and condoms. Toothpaste and flosser sticks. Lots of deodorant.
- The car’s turn. Get the emissions test done, the inspection, and the renewed registration. Fuck me; my license is expiring.
- Go to the grocery store. Ahhhh, one kid offers to go so I don’t have to. Sweet! He says he needs a list. I say, “Use your best judgement” and hand him a credit card. He comes back with salt and vinegar potato chips and beef jerky.
- Go to the grocery store.
- Youngest kid is going into senior year, so that comes with a few chores as well: take four college trips, plan four more, hire an SAT tutor, register for fall SATs, harass child about the college essay and common application, and make appointments with a college counselor.
- The apartment is a shit show. Clean the cat boxes and empty the dishwasher. Recycle beer bottles and throw out pizza boxes. Load the dishwasher and walk the damn dog.
- Time for summer guests! Awesome! Wash sheets, buy food, clean the bathroom.
- Ask youngest about his summer reading; he’s lost the book. Go to Barnes & Noble.
- Fill out two hundred pages of health forms for the coming school year.
- Make a huge trip to Target/Bed, Bath, & Beyond for new pillows, a mini-fridge, and fans. (Didn’t we buy fans last year? Yes, but they all broke.)
- Drive the kids back to school.
- Sit down in a chair with a book and feel forlorn. Text the kids: Miss you guys!! 🙁
Did I mention that fall is a great time to get caught up on summer reading, writing, and rest??