“Yeah, don’t quit your day job.”
For years I had no idea what that meant. Then I realized your “day job” is the activity that helps you pay for all the trouble you get into when you’re not at work. It’s also the place where you spend the majority of your daylight hours.. hopelessly gazing out the window (if you’re lucky enough to have one) wishing you could run away on your lunch hour and never look back.
Ah, the day job. I always knew I wasn’t cut out for that brain-draining 9 to 5 grind…kinda the same way I knew I’d never make it in prison. For me they are one in the same (and those orange jumpsuits would look awful with my complexion).
I think I made up my mind after watching a Dunkin’ Donuts commercial when I was a kid. That’s how life works; one day you’re watching The Jefferson’s and before you know it, you make a monumental life-shaping decision. Anyhow, you might remember the commercial. It’s the one where the chubby Dunkin Donuts guy is half-asleep leaving his house at the crack of dawn because he “has to make the donuts” and returns exhausted at the end of the day saying “he’s made the donuts.” He eventually runs into himself because he doesn’t know if he’s coming or going. Yep, that was all I needed. I swore I would never run into myself after making donuts all day. I would never recover from the shock of realizing there’s another me running around unsupervised.
Radio always seemed like my kind of day job. The DJ’s always sounded like they were having a blast, they’d be doing something wild and crazy everyday, and none of them were ever on the air for more than 4 or 5 hours (I was counting.) I immediately saw my future, and luckily I made the perfect choice. As far as day jobs go, I must say mine is one of the best. Stressful? Yes. Filled with immature, egotistical fools? Absolutely. But the hours are generally short, the perks are pretty fantastic, and the break room is always filled with countless boxes of Dunkin’ Donuts for all to enjoy.
How’s that for irony?