Schooled by Guest Blogger Anisha Lakhani

The Debs are delighted to welcome debut novelist Anisha Lakhani as our guest today, author of the very funny and unputdownable Schooled.

There never was a grog, in the history of grogs, that I wished more fervently would become an actual manifestation of its title than The Debutante Ball. Blue blood will be replaced by blue ink, and new authors wearing white will dance-all-night like Eliza Doolittle on the arms of dashing author princes like John Grisham and drink champagne and gossip with author princess Meg Cabot. My first novel, Schooled, came out on Tuesday, August 5th, and I can assure you that had there been such a ball, I would have attended. Believe me, I have the determination and the chutzpah of Cinderella.

So in the absence of a Debutante Ball, what did I do on my “pub day?” (I’m learning all sorts of writer slang) I woke up and checked my Amazon rating. After brushing my teeth, I checked it again. I called my parents, sang “Happy Birthday to Me” (seriously, it feels like your birthday so really it’s the only appropriate song to sing) and then checked my rating again. Then my little brother called and suggested I get a life and try and find another activity. So I went to Barnes & Noble to spy on my book. If Narcissist is still looking for a wife, that was me on Tuesday.

Wednesday was self-loathing and paranoia day. Schooled is being touted as a “controversial book” and people are whispering of a “tell-all” in which I “rat out” all my colleagues and students at Dalton, a private school I worked at for the last eight years. It’s not. Certainly I used my experiences as a seventh grade English teacher and Middle School Department Chair as a springboard, but the stories in Schooled are a compilation of my experience, stories I heard through the years from other teachers, tutors, and students, as well as straight-up, good old-fashioned fiction. The fact is I really enjoyed working at Dalton and made some lifetime friendships there But OH NO some bloggers and reviewers are having a field day with stirring up controversy about how I “messed up my life” and I am convinced everyone hates me. Why don’t they understand my book? Why don’t they understand me? Why can’t I be loved? Wednesday is a sad, sad day and I drown myself in carbohydrates. I am still unbearably self-involved.

I was initially set to come to the Debutante Ball on my pub date, and all I can say is that I am incredibly grateful for the small delay. Here’s what even a few days has taught me: Amazon numbers are only pleasing to Stephenie Meyers (and well deserved that vampire Edward Cullen seems hot), having your first novel published is like discovering calorie-free chocolate, and having an ex-student who is now flourishing in college and making Dean’s List every semester call and say “I had to keep putting your book down because I was laughing so hard” IS the reward. For a teacher, having my student tell me “I’m proud of you” was a little like getting that ‘ol glass slipper back. There may not be a ball, but this deb got properly Schooled and is waltzing up and down the streets of New York. . . and okay, maybe the aisles of Barnes and Noble.

Anisha Lakhani

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Lisa Daily is a real-life TV dating expert on Daytime. She's a syndicated relationships columnist, a popular media guest seen everywhere from MTV to the New York Times, and the author of the bestselling dating advice book, Stop Getting Dumped! : All you need to know to make men fall madly in love with you and marry "The One" in 3 years or less. Visit lisa online at www.lisadaily.com

18 thoughts on “Schooled by Guest Blogger Anisha Lakhani

  1. anisha–we’re so glad you could at least e-dance with us here at the Debutante Ball! And so happy for your fabulous review in People Magazine this week! Enjoy all the hoplah and ignore the naysayers!

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  5. I understand and relate to EVERYTHING you’re saying about the day and week of publication! I just launched my book too and it’s made me a tad obsessed and uber emotional too. Best of luck–Schooled sounds like a wonderful book.

  6. Anisha,

    Thanks so much for joining us at the ball. I thought your book was fabulous, a really enjoyable read. (Although as a parent, it completely terrified me.)

    Best of luck on your launch, and thanks for joining us at the Ball today!

    Best,

    Lisa

  7. Hey Anisha!! Great guest blog my dear. I’ve been checking your Amazon’s ratings and I don’t think you have anything to worry about. I would totally be checking out bookstores over the next couple of weeks if my book came out too.
    One time an old friend of mine was in her college dorm commons room watching MTV. She was a bit shy and she noticed that a guy had sat at the other end of the couch she was sitting on but she didn’t look to see his face. They watched some music videos in silence and a Dave Matthews Band video cam on. The guy asked her what she thought of Dave Matthews and when she turned to answer him that she liked him alright, she realized that they guy sittingon the couch WAS DAVE MATTHEWS. Turns out that his girlfriend (now wife) attended her school and he was visiting for the weekend. That would be cool if you saw someone buying your book and went up to them and asked them a question about the book and then they realized that the picture on the back was actually talking to them.
    XOXO-K

  8. This sounds like a terrific book!

    And can a writer during pub week be anything but unbearably self-involved?

    Here’s to skyrocketing sales!

  9. Great post, I’m sure every Deb has done exactly the same over their first few days…..many congrats! I’m looking forward to reading Schooled.

  10. Your comment about checking your ranking twice made me smile and visiting the store too.

    My game is on sales in Barnes & Noble and I’d check my local store if I had one, for now checking the rankings will have to do:)

    Congrats.

  11. Way to knock one out of the ball park. Think of yourself as a spiritual warrior and your book as your campaign and you will be fine. Hold your center, keep your composure, and make your whole family proud. Especially your favorite cousins :).

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