Oh this is a topic meant to egg me on, I’m sure! The other debs want to know about my quarter trick, or perhaps the how and why of my learning it, but I have to protect my sources so I can’t do that.
Since I’ve already revealed my talents for excessive hip-gyration, goofy poetry-writing and fixing electronic devices by shaking them, plus outed myself as a cherry-stem-tyer (planning a duel with Deb Jenny in July), my fellow debs probably think I’m going to confess all my other hidden talents.
They probably think I’m going to tell you I speak French when drinking and am also apt to thinking I’ve morphed into a fashion model, acrobat, Solid Gold dancer or Rock Star when under the influence. They think I’m going to brag about how I can still do the splits and touch my hands to my heels while in a back-bend and know all the songs from The Wizard of Oz, even the ones that didn’t make it into the movie. And then there’s the useful (and classy) talent of balancing dinner rolls on my head–as if I’m going to tell you about that!
They might think I’m going to reveal my very cool-looking Russian drinking trick, the one I learned (from real Russians of the Moscow Art Theater) while working on the part of Masha in The Seagull a bazillion years ago, the one where you roll a glass full of straight vodka along your cheek one-handed, from your ear to your mouth, tip the glass up, down the vodka, roll the glass back up to your ear and present it for refilling. (Truthfully, the most important part of this trick is to switch the vodka for water and leave the serious vodka drinking to others–in my case, the Russians themselves, who managed to seem only slightly woeful after a night of fancy vodka tricks.)
But all of these talents would make me sound like a bit of a lush with a wild lifestyle when I am, at the moment, a homebody with a low alcohol tolerance and small child whose early rising is a serious deterrent to late nights of any kind much less singing, dancing, acrobatics or vodka drinking in any language at all.
So let me just tell you that I’m excellent at parking two cars in our one-car garage, hiding vegetables in muffins, singing the ABCs while marching in place and throwing the ball for the pooch…and I have a crazy ability to memorize lines quickly–a talent I have no use for anymore but one which makes The Oppressor gnash his teeth every time I help him prep for an audition.
Thanks for reading!
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