Why is it that fast-food burgers taste like HEAVEN when you get them hot and fresh, but that same burger will taste like burnt seaweed a few hours later when you re-heat it in the microwave? I’ve seen workers warm up burgers in microwaves at fast-food joints a million times.. so what am I missing? Do they have access to some revolutionary “waves” that I need to get a hold of? Is there a burger shelf-life I’m unaware of? These are the things that keep me awake at night.
Soooo now that we got that out of the way, let’s get to the topic at hand. MY BOOK! Funny, I wrote a whole book and had plenty to say while I was writing it, but suddenly I’m at a loss for words. Actually getting choked up a bit… hang on.. lip quivering, tears streaming…. I need a minute.
Ok, I have GOT to peeling onions when I’m blogging!
101 Ways to Torture Your Husband has finally arrived, and I’ll tell ya, Momma has been ready to birth this baby for quite some time now. Publishing a book is truly the closest thing to giving birth there is. Even morning sickness applies; it happens the day after you land your publishing deal and you realize complete strangers will eventually be reading your innermost thoughts –and possibly discussing them on facebook.
As with the fast-food burger and the microwave, there are many mysteries I have yet to understand about the publishing world. For example, why is it that Barnes and Noble released my book in stores WEEKS before my actual release date? I dunno… but then again, I L O V E them for it! Yay Barnes and Noble!!!! Obviously you guys like to get a jump on things, and for that you have my eternal devotion. Here’s another mystery: why is it when I walk into stores my book will either be:
a) prominently displayed on the “New Releases” table
b) stuffed into some cobwebbed corner of the “Humor” section
Add this to the list of things that keep me up at night…but boy, I really feel like any minute now I’m going to wake up from this dream and be back on the farm with Auntie M after suffering a major bang on the head. It still doesn’t seem real. God, ya really outdid yourself with this one big guy! Thanks for the ride. I’ll be pinching myself all the way to The Oprah Show.
Ok, so on to our little contest. Simply leave a comment below and I’ll randomly pick 2 winners who will receive an autographed copy of my book. (No Mom, you can’t participate.) Hey listen.. I would love to give you ALL a free copy, but the baby needs a new pair of shoes. Whose baby? I’m not sure exactly…but I believe they requested black patent leather -and those don’t come cheap.
Thanks for stopping in. Good luck, and Happy Torturing!