As The New York Times Fertility Diary
columnist who chronicled my three-year IVF journey to have a baby in more than 30 columns, dozens of women reach out to me each week asking questions, requesting recommendations or needing moral support.
Infertility is exasperating, confounding and expensive. While there are plenty of pregnancy books out there, like What to Expect When You’re Expecting or Taking Charge of Your Fertility, there is no real guide to the complex process of getting pregnant when you can’t—and not by someone like me, who has been through almost every aspect of the process, from miscarriage to genetic testing, egg donor and finally, live birth. (My daughter is two!)
That’s why I’ve put together What to Expect When You’re Not Expecting: A Girlfriend’s Guide to Infertility, a straightforward and frank step-by-step book, which can be read by the millions of women and their partners who are having trouble conceiving, staying pregnant, considering egg-freezing, adoption, surrogacy and donor-conception. They all need help not only knowing what to do next, but what to expect from the process physically, emotionally and financially.
So many doctors and books in this field push only one way of doings things: they’re either pro-Western medicine or anti-IVF or pro-naturalists or who knows what. But what I and anyone else going through this insanity has learned is that no one knows everything — although it seems like no one knows anything…
I don’t either. That’s why I bring in my experience but also talk to experts in the field, from reproductive endocrinologists to embryologists to acupuncturists and more. I want to help others avoid the mistakes I made — and feel like they have a friend as long as they’re on this journey.
Attached is the proposal.